Friday, August 19, 2011

Perception.


Lil' Moment Observed

Inception can eat its heart out.  Perception is way trippier.

Looking in the mirror is a bit less of an egregious experience than it used to be, these days.  Just ask my roommate; she is a huge fan of mocking my mirror faces.  A while back, I’d been busy all day grocery shopping, cleaning house, and so on.  I was "sweatygross," as I call it, but happened to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror in the hall when I passed by, and thought to myself, “Hey…  Not bad, kid.”  It felt really, really good and I wished someone was right there to grab a photo of me.  I’ve often wondered if I see the same thing that others see.  So, due to the lack of photographer, I grabbed my camera to get a picture as I saw myself, or how I perceived myself, rather.  I managed to capture it.


This little moment totally messed with my mind, man.  And this little moment happened again tonight.  It’s so strange how I can look in the mirror, and even though I can see the difference, I don’t see myself differently.  I look in the mirror and I still see the 300+ pound girl.   So it kind of makes me wonder when, if ever, my perception of myself and the girl I see in the mirror will decide to merge. 

I am slightly biased when I look in the mirror seeing as I’m looking at myself.  Yeah…  Fairly biased.  So, how do you know if what you see in the mirror is good, or bad, or real, or what others see, or what?!

Does Heidi Klum look in the mirror and see a supermodel? 

Does Jason Schwartzman look in the mirror and see a stud?  Oh, hush up.  The fact I’m smitten with him is neither here nor there.  You get the analogy.  Humor me. 

The point is, I’ve got a ways to go in this department, and maybe one day my perception and my reality will decide to hang out.  In the meantime, I’ll be happy with my little moments.

9 comments:

  1. Way to go, lady! I'm sure everything will all come together, but yes, I feel the same way!

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  2. Sarah, Thanks for sharing this! You are going to bless and help so many others in their journeys in life by your honesty, openness and your humor!! You've always been a special person to me, and I am so happy for you and for your "new" life and for ALL the many blessings God has in store for you ahead on this journey we call "life." Thanks for being YOU!!

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  3. Sarah, I loved reading this. The funny thing is, I have always thought you were so beautiful inside and out. The way you carried yourself with such confidence. I know where you are coming from when looking in the mirror, I still see the girl who was 80lbs heavier. It's not until I see a picture of me that I think, wow I'm lookin pretty good! :)

    Keep up the good work girl! I love hearing about your weight loss journey. I'm so very proud of you! xo

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  4. this is great Sarah! I'm so excited to follow you on your journey! And I LOVE the title of your blog! So clever...but you always have been!

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  5. Sarah, I think you are looking great! You have come a long way already! Maybe you should post an old picture of you so people who don't know you will know how hard you've been working. You are truly an inspiration and I will be checking your blog often! Keep up the good work!

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  6. Thanks, guys! Shelley, you're totally right. I definitely will - I want people to see what they're just as capable of, whether it's weight, or fear, or whatever else they struggle with. I love humans and I'm hoping all of this will help a few out. :)

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  7. I posted something like 3 times, saying "Great job", "keep up the good work", and so on....it was good, but now I've lost it and it's so not genuine. So anyway, I look forward to reading this. Keep going and keep motivating others and being an inspiration to all. Love ya!
    Krissy

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  8. i am a plus sized girl..dwindling around a us size14.i here from everyone almost on a regular basis about my weight..it's as if i have very little to show otherwise.you have touched a chord sarah..i came here to say you looked fabulous..i am leaving a follower..because as google describes it a follower is someone interested in your blog.well i am interested.blog often.and inspire people like me.

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  9. You're too kind, Debi! I'll be following you, too. You're definitely a kindred spirit. Keep it up and keep in touch.

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